So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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