No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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