Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
