Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
