the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
