i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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