I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
