kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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