im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
too bad you live with your parents still
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize