redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
