I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
