just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Randomize
