let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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