yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
