i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
