just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Randomize
