why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
