Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
