I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Randomize
