So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
