he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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