For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
