My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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