i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
