oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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