she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Randomize
