I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I am one with the molecules
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Randomize
