I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
