i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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