make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
why is half of my head shaved?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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