I want to make a zoo with you.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Randomize