But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
