i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
