If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
