My room smells like vodka and shame
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
i think i have herpe
just one?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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