His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
how can u be prego again
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize