Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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