its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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