So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
