New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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