I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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