OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
she woke up with a sticky ear
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
