did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
whose ass print is on the piano?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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