Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
