similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
