My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
