physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
