the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
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