its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize