The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
