Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
